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Sat, Oct 11 2008 

Published June 06, 2008 06:38 pm - As promised last week, in the interest of fairness and avoiding charges of discrimination, the topic of this week’s report from the Gender Intelligence Research Lab (or GIRL) is why females, on occasion, do things considered by others as being gray-matter challenged.


GIRL studies Big-Texas-Cinnamon-Roll Incident


By Kelly Kazek
kelly@athensnews-courier.com

Poor blondes.

Everyone making all those jokes, entire books of them, and that was BEFORE Paris, Britney and Lindsay came along.

It’s a darn shame.

It’s not as if blondes are the only stupid females in the world.

As promised last week, in the interest of fairness and avoiding charges of discrimination, the topic of this week’s report from the Gender Intelligence Research Lab (or GIRL) is why we women are forced to endure really stupid Ben Stiller movies and repeated displays of public male scratching of areas that would otherwise be considered private.

I am such a kidder. What I meant to say is, GIRL will study why females, on occasion, might, just possibly, do things considered by others as being gray-matter challenged.

We’ll take this lesson in two parts:

1. Is the color of one’s hair relevant if no one can prove its natural shade?

And, 2. Females may be ignorant but we ain’t stupid.

Let’s start with an example of the theory that one’s brain activity decreases in direct proportion to the amount of dye on one’s hair.

The subject of this example is a reporter in our newsroom we’ll call Jean Cole (mainly because that’s her name).

She is not a blonde but she plays one on TV.

Kidding again!

Seriously, Jean is a redhead, a talented copy editor and gifted writer, who is known around the newsroom for — how can we put this delicately? —being a safety hazard.

I am not sure, but I think Jean’s mom coined the phrase: “You’ll put your eye out!”



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